Healing Series Part 1: Body Stress Release

In this healing series, I’ll explain the various healing practices that I’ve experienced and what I gained from them. I truly believe that in taking an active role in healing myself that I have sped up my recovery. Today’s topic is called Body Stress Release, or BSR for short.

Even before I became ill I met a wonderful lady called Lourentia at a business networking breakfast. I have since abandoned the networking breakfasts but it was a real blessing to meet such a quality person. I have been going to her sporadically for many years and at stressful times, ironically, I scaled back on the visits. After my diagnosis of my stress-induced auto-immune disease, I started going for BSR again.

Lourentia asks me each time where I feel discomfort or pain in my body. In the past I’d have aches and pains due to running injuries or stiffness. Since my diagnosis, I usually just feel tired, and not surprisingly have a lot of tension in my neck and shoulders. So I tell her all the areas that ail me so that she knows where to focus her efforts.

I take off only my shoes and then lie face down on a treatment table, much like the ones used for massage. I can breathe through the hole in the table my feet must dangle off the edge of the table. Lourentia then begins her treatment by putting her hands onto my back. She gets a feel of where the body needs work and goes ahead with the treatment. You are required to turn onto your back midway during the treatment in order to access all parts of the body. 

Just as the name suggests, the premise of BSR is to release, by small touches to pressure points, the stress that is trapped in various parts of the body. The practitioner tests for stress in many areas of the body and then works to release it. They use the feet as a means to monitor the effects of what they implement. I feel sensations in my body as Lourentia performs the releases, almost like a little ripple of something travelling up my spine or down my legs. Sometimes the pressure needs to be quite hard and the points can be quite tender but overall it is a very pleasant experience and something that has helped me a great deal.

Being an ultra-marathon runner I have a strong belief in the mind-body connection as it is very clear that your mind tides you through the end of a tough race. This connection has been even more evident to me this year as I’ve understood how stress has caused my body to turn on itself. Thankfully I am in remission now and the feedback from Lourentia also points to a much greater recovery since last year.

There are many ways in which BSR can help improve your overall health such as better posture, released tension in the neck, shoulders and back and even things like sinus. There are no side effects and it is a non-invasive treatment. I have benefited from BSR in treating a variety of ailments but in current times, to diminish the stress held in my body, particularly neck and shoulders. It must be said that with the many healing experiences I'm undergoing, it's difficult to attribute improvement to one discipline but overall, my sinus is not nearly as bad as it usually is during winter and my immune system is getting stronger. 

If you are interested, you can read more about Body Stress Release here: http://www.bodystressrelease.com/home/3

Alternative Medicine – Homeopathy

I had always been quite suspicious about alternative healing practices and practitioners until 2012. I was the mother of a three month old baby and as expected was sleep-deprived and pretty stressed. Labour law in our country specifies that mothers are entitled to four months of maternity leave, paid or unpaid. I was working in our ‘family’ business at that time and as a business owner, there’s really no such thing as maternity leave. I recall having meetings at my house feeling so frazzled that it was difficult to concentrate. I had to issue instructions from my home office and keep up to pace with client requests and insubordination from a staff member who challenged my decisions to modernise the business.

After three months, I went back to work, despite being highly emotional about leaving my tiny baby at a preschool. I elected to work half days for the first two weeks so that I could manage with the discomfort of feeding and to ensure my baby adjusted to the new routine. On 1 February 2012, my first full day back at work, I had a cold and was feeling awful. I didn’t feel justified in staying home, given the fact that customer billing was due in the first few days of the month. Mid-morning an irate family member attacked the office with a hammer and a screwdriver as a result of a marital dispute.

Being the only person of authority around, I had to confront her to try to calm the situation down and to mitigate the damage to the business. Furniture was thrown around, computers smashed, signage ripped off the front gate, pot plants tipped over and various places smashed with the hammer. When I confronted her I was verbally abused and the hammer was smashed against the wall within a metre from my head. By the wild look in her eye, I was concerned about not surviving the day or being permanently brain damaged. I thought of my little baby and how my husband would manage with our two kids in the event of my death or disability. The violence of the situation was truly a traumatic event, at a time when I was already fragile.

For the six months or so that followed the event, I had a series of colds and flu that hit me with regularity that was disturbing. I picked up every conceivable virus that came my way due to exposure from a little child at preschool and a weakened immune system. I literally had a few days in between illnesses where I was OK and then I would get sick again. I was obviously under a great deal of stress in dealing with the situation itself and the aftermath in the office.

I had regularly visited a chiropractor to assist with my minor running injuries and alignment. I went to see her for the tension in my neck and shoulders as a result of the stress. I had told her about the traumatic event that I experienced and I was telling her all about my susceptibility to colds and flu while she treated me. She suggested that I might have adrenal fatigue and recommended that I visit a homeopath.

"Adrenal fatigue is a collection of signs and symptoms, known as a syndrome, that results when the adrenal glands function below the necessary level. Most commonly associated with intense or prolonged stress."

The adrenal glands on top of the kidneys are part of the endocrine system and they secrete adrenaline as part of the body’s response to stress. This article discusses the fight or flight response: http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/emotions/fear2.htm Part of this response to stress is to shut down the immune system in order to deal with the immediate danger.

I was sceptical about homeopathy but interested in her evaluation of my health and how she could treat me. She felt my pulse and looked at my tongue, punctuated with writing a few strange symbols on her notepad. She confirmed that I had adrenal fatigue and provided me with medication to treat it. I spent months treating the condition and slowly started to improve enough to resume running.

I had been to my standard doctor many times and the treatment for each cold focussed on only the one incidence and merely on the symptoms, not the underlying cause. As much as I think western medicine is important and cannot be abandoned, I had discovered a solution and was being treated holistically for the first time.It is no surprise for me that a diagnosis of Graves’ disease is a malfunction of the endocrine system, also where the adrenals fall, and an auto-immune disease initiated by stress. I had been heading towards the diagnosis this year even as far back as 2012.

I’m open to new experiences and I find them energising.  With such a serious diagnosis I have been more than willing to investigate and explore as many alternative healing practices as I can. I have found some treatments more effective for me personally than others but I believe it is a matter of what resonates with you and also what ails you. In the coming weeks I’ll be doing a series on healing practices to share my experiences.

Particularly for the sceptics, you may get a kick out of this fun clip poking fun at homeopathy.  

Learning the Ropes

To be perfectly honest, I am learning the ropes of blogging. I’m no expert and I don’t even follow other blogs. That is my upfront disclaimer if I happen to break any written or unwritten rule of blogging etiquette.

Those of you who first saw my blog might have noticed that I've refined the layout somewhat. I think it fits my style and for those who need the tip, be sure to take a look at the gadgets on the right that tuck away neatly. I thought I created the capability to follow by email but I’m not sure if I got that right. And yes, the bullets of my last blog post are ugly. I've recently read that learning and growing is a key ingredient to happiness so bring on the learning!

I’m also curious to know what readers think of AdSense. I’m not a big fan of ads, and their assault on the senses – especially anything that throbs. Earning money while writing sounds quite appealing to me though.

I struggle to achieve things without a goal. If I can’t run an ultra-marathon this year, I’ll have to find goals associated with getting better or learning. So I've decided to follow three blogs as my first goal and hopefully I’ll pick up some tips.

Over a year ago I started an electronic journal that I called a ‘God blog’ due to my fear of public humiliation. In writing, identifying the target audience is one of the first important things to decide as it shapes the style substantially. She already knows me and wouldn't judge me too harshly so that’s what I called it. It is lonely being a business owner as you have no-one to talk to about your challenges. You can’t talk to your staff about your worries of being able to pay salaries or whether you’re leading this thing in the right direction. You need to appear confident and calm in knowing what you’re doing. So writing was my outlet and my tool in crystallising my thinking about the future of the business. I continue to use it in the path to my new career trusting that the same enlightenment is on its way.

So I think my journey will go something like this: acceptance then understanding, then healing and finally action. Since my diagnosis three weeks ago, I have most certainly accepted that my life needs to change. I think I’m still trying to understand why, although I’m most of the way through that phase. The next phase of healing will most likely be quite long as I let my body recover from years of going against the flow and suppressing my fatigue. That may take a good few months but I can say that I’m already starting to feel better.

I’m not known for my patience and I do find it very irritating that I can only have one outing a day. More than that and I find I’m pretty tired by the evening. Through regularly testing my patience, I think my children have helped me become more patient. Watching a toddler ram a round peg into a square hole (literally) over and over can be most frustrating. I think I've told them hundreds of times that you don’t need to tip a cup with a straw. I've learned to accept and even marvel at the pure volume of what human beings have to learn. My six-year-old asked me the other day ‘What is a test?’ and my first reaction was ‘Oh boy, does she have a long way to go.’ But seeing how excited she is to learn to read without being overwhelmed by how far she has to go, is inspiring to me. She tackles learning with the same gusto as she does playing.  

Our society really seems to value being busy. When people ask about my well-being I’m not sure I want my response to always be ‘Oh I’m so busy I can barely cope’. Since I've taken a step back from the hamster wheel, I've started to notice the small things around me. Since my condition makes me overheat a lot, the rain is absolutely glorious! I’m a lot less abrupt with my kids now too and I’m taking the time to tickle them; to give them frights and really listen to what they’re saying.  I want a life that contains living on purpose, stopping to enjoy each important moment; and filled with activities that are fulfilling (not just time-consuming).

I've secured myself a four month sabbatical from the business. I’m a very determined person and when I focus on something I can get it right. So now my major commitment is to get kids to school and to recover. Resting on purpose is very weird to me but perhaps it’s one of the lessons I have to learn.

Adequate recovery will mean that I’ll be ready to take action when the time comes. The action will be to ensure that my job is fulfilling, I have enough space to recover from all the things that drain my reserves during the day and I will have time to be a good parent too. As much as I have a need to achieve professionally, I’d rather be remembered for being a good parent because the impact is far more meaningful.

So I’m learning the ropes with blogging, but also with how far I can push myself currently. I am trying to really listen to my body to make sure I’m picking up early cues. It’s not forever but it is an important part of the process to ensure the future is designed right.

Analysing the Problem

Firstly, I must confess I am overwhelmed by the support and compassion shown by the readers thus far. In less than 24 hours I have had over 300 page views which I’m astounded at. I've always been very cautious to share my views and feelings publicly but I must say I’m really excited about sharing this journey and perhaps having it resonate with some of you. Thank you for your interest and the well-needed support you've offered me.

I have often had some really interesting discussions around the concept of a career passion. I've been amazed at how many people have revealed that their life passion is not what they are currently doing for a living. What surprises me is that it’s mostly people who I already perceive to be experts in their field. How many of us are walking around with hidden passions and incredible talents that are not being used? This blog is about my journey from where I am now to a future career that is designed on purpose to make the most of my talents and abilities. I’m hoping that it inspires some of you to take steps towards making your life more enjoyable too.

Medication is all good and well. But I don’t believe I’ll get a lot better by medication alone. The source of the problem needs to be uncovered and addressed in order to get fully well and avoid a relapse. So being the problem-solver that I am, I've spent a lot of time analyzing what caused me to get so sick from stress. Why doesn't this happen to other people? Am I not strong enough to withstand the stress when others can? And yes, I even drew a diagram. To protect the names of the not-so-innocent, I've sanitized it a bit.

There’s a lot in there to digest so I’ll just keep it high-level. My sources of stress are the following:

•        Sense of obligation to deliver on my promises – to various life stakeholders.
•        Being behind in technology by about 20 years, the need to catch-up and meet with regulation, led to no opportunity to innovate. Life without innovation is boring to me.
•        Without a modern system, I could not fulfill my vision for the company.
•        I need to work with people who can be inspired, who want me as their leader and who want to improve.
•        As an introvert, I spent the whole day meeting the needs of others. After work, the onslaught of little children and meeting their needs meant no respite for me to  recover.
•        As someone who is right brained, my day was filled with admin, accounting and compliance. No room to create the new, and have some fun.

If I had known myself better at the outset, I could have rearranged things to ensure my environment met my needs. Susan Cain’s book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, has helped me a great deal in knowing myself better and accepting myself. Introverts are not dysfunctional, they can be spectacular. Albert Einstein, Steve Wozniak, Gandhi, Dr Seuss are examples of famous introverts. But now I know. I must consciously design my future to meet my own needs, not only the needs of others.

And to think this is only the start of the journey – very exciting. Pity it took a serious illness to trigger it, but perhaps many of us are not listening to the cues around us or our own bodies telling us that it’s not sustainable. Hopefully some of you can learn from my mistake and change direction before you become ill.

A quote from Petrus, the guide in Paulo Coelho’s The Pilgrimage “The person who does not know how to listen will never hear the advice that life offers us all the time.”

Introduction

I've recently been diagnosed with a stress-induced life-long condition. This has caused me to re-evaluate my life and ensure that I make the rest of it meaningful and intention-filled. I've also just turned 40 so I figure the Universe is telling me to take stock.

To me, being happy is the most important thing in life. Happiness is not wealth, or stuff, but people and being the best person I can be. I read an article recently about the regrets people have when they’re close to death. The underlying theme is relationships and this is something that has come up a lot in my life. 

I’m not particularly a people’s person but I am a people-pleaser (or an Obliger as Gretchen Rubin would say). I’m an introvert and get very tired being around people a lot. Taking time to recharge can be very difficult in a house where the little people follow me to the toilet. That being said, I do love people and need them in my day.

I’m blessed to have a wonderful husband and two amazing little girls who are the source of great joy for me. They drive me nuts too, don’t get me wrong. We live in a great home with fun, noise and laughter. I value my friends a lot, although I’m not a very good friend. Perhaps once I've finished my journey I’ll be a better friend.

The primary source of stress in my life has always been work. Since I've started working, I've tried really hard to give it my best and with reasonable success. The last five years of my career have been the hardest by far. I've been managing a business I took over from my father. I learned a great deal but I have discovered over the past few months that it is not my passion and never will be. Living someone else’s dream is not the path to happiness.

I've subscribed to many newsletters and have been watching TED talks and reading numerous books on the search for happiness. I've learned some wonderful things and I don’t remember a time when I've grown so much inside. And maybe outside from not being allowed to exercise!

I believe that meaning is the most important aspect of making our work-lives happy. That’s why I left the corporate world – I didn't have meaning. And after just having had a child, my world was full of meaning at home. The stark contrast at work was too much to bear. I jumped into the family business head first and started learning and learning and learning. I made mistakes but I also had successes and loved the ability to steer the ship myself into a direction that I decided. I made sure I measured the results and that was really fulfilling, when I got it right.

What was fundamentally missing from this equation was that I was not being true to my self. I think that relationships with people are important but the one with yourself is a non-negotiable! I’m a right-brained person doing admin and accounting for most of my day. I’m an introvert, trying to sell. I have a lot of things to offer but they won’t be found when I’m in the foetal position trying to recover from doing things I hate, and being who I’m not. I need to know myself well enough and be kind to myself to make sure I'm ok too. Something mothers sometimes don't get right.

I strongly believe that we can engineer our own lives to be happy. I’m always going on about how happiness is a choice. There are too many miserable people in the world, not doing a thing to change their circumstances. And now I find myself with a serious illness that is keeping me from any kind of exercise. The same person who runs ultra-marathons for fun. What I am forced into now is rest and recovery. It’s boring, very boring.

But this is my journey and there is something important to learn from this experience. This may just be the catalyst that my life needed to be overflowing with joy – not only from my family but from my work too.

So if you’re interested, please follow me on my journey to design a new career, based on what I truly love.